MusICian

yeah, i’m talking about the proficiency tests for SYF at nan chiau. basically it helps us understand each member’s weaknesses in their playing, and it also helps them understand which are the places they should work out individually. perhaps sectional training is getting less effective now since most of them could ‘get their parts’ when they hide behind the rest who can play! so every individual should also work out their own weaker parts, since everybody’s strengths and weaknesses are different.

and yeah, i’m a little less stressed up now. took some of the intonation problems on the Eb clarinet away by playing an octave lower. also, i could hit the high notes with a little more ease at sectionals yesterday. i guess the trick is to not try to play so softly. of course i don’t wanna stick out, but i guess i’m not that advanced a player yet to hit those notes with confidence, play soft, and still don’t squeak!

misunderstandings with sweetie were cleared and all’s well. i’m going to her place for lunch! looks like her mom really adores me. haha. it shouldn’t be that tough to clear the ‘mother-in-law’ stage

argh, debts are coming up but pay isn’t coming in. do i really have to eat grass??? can’t blame anyone, the school takes at least 2 weeks to process my pay claims, which i just submitted today. guess i really have to eat grass! hahahaa… *faint*

recently (actually, last tuesday) i just celebrated my 25th birthday and 1st official anniversary with sweetie in spectacular fashion. despite being ill, we did loads of things including watching ‘The Last Dance’, shopping for books, shopping for cuff links, having a great dinner at New York New York, having quiet moments at esplanade and finally VCH. a wonderful day! recieved two unforgettable gifts from sweetie:

yeah, here goes the presents. i also recieved two very exciting gifts from the NCWO saxophone section, and a big hand-made card from the rest of the band!

thank you, NCWO! you’ve made my 25th birthday interesting, and you’ve really cheered me up on a stressful day!

and of course, thank you dear, for making my 25th birthday celebration such a wonderful one! i truly truly appreciate what you have done for me

well, that is the happiness part of course. but i’ve yet to come to the stress part.

somehow, i’ve been expected a lot of things recently. and of course, i have been expecting a lot from myself too, with regards to giving more in band practices and playing well. ‘Danceries’ is still in a complete mess for me; i still can’t hit the high notes properly without squeaking. still haven’t figured out a lot of running notes despite concert being this saturday. and somehow my mom has this habit of slamming the door and the phone on me when she doesn’t get what she wants (like getting me to drink her soup). and somehow i just couldn’t satisfy everybody at the same time. of course that’s not possible, but i didn’t need unreasonable treatment. yesterday i was so stressed up that i wanted to run away from band practice halfway. and definitely what was going on inside didn’t help at all. misplacing of a file, seating arrangements, rotation of parts without my involvement etc.

and it seems that suddenly lots of expectations sprung up. so, what really is expected of me? i’m almost running my life in such a way i have no time for myself. i’m almost ignoring all of my own pressures just to make the people around me happy. what more can i do? everybody has their own things to be stressed up about. why take it out on me? am i that undesirable a person that always does things wrong?

pardon my outburst. it’s been very much a roller-coaster ride for me this whole week. from the night i had to sleep in the living room so that my brother could recover from fever, till i fell sick myself, till i had to deal with my mom, till i had to deal with lugging the alto clarinet to eunos and back, till i had to deal with everything myself while people around me don’t understand. what more do you want me to do?

happy belated 25th birthday to me. i guess it really means extra burdens upon my weakened shoulders. i’ll deal with them. with or without understanding, i guess.

korean boys, twins, 6 hours per 4 weeks. this assignment gives me $500 plus a month! i’m starting this saturday. haha. but well, of course that gives me less time for my other commitments. but i’m sure i can do it. the tough period is SYF. the tough period is this year. after this year, i would have saved up enough for a good clarinet. hopefully…

FSPS band, 3 sessions of 3 hours a week; NCWO, 2 sessions of 3 hours a week; fiona, 1 session a week (if not cancelled); korean twins, 6 sessions per week; PRSS band, 1 session a week. at full capacity i should be earning about $2700 a month. aim to use less than $700 every month and i should be able to save $2000 at full capacity. but at full capacity i’d probably need some more money for other stuff, so probably can save $1700. ok, big saving plans for 2007! i hope they all work out

gotta save up for 2 big events. i wanna bring home 2 brides

what… 1 wife and a clarinet lah. these 2 weddings not cheap ok… hahaha. and of course, save up for WMC 2009.

but now i wonder, how long can i keep this up?

oh no, another open-ended, everything’s possible but not suitable kind of module! i don’t know if it’s a good thing. definitely it’s gonna be like my kind of module, can just do the paper with an open mind and loads of material in front of me in the exam hall. but it’s kinda tough, with loads and loads of readings (just like the XD module) every single week. class participation is almost a must. and not to forget i’ll be always formally dressed for that class cos it falls on friday mornings!

good startup session with the sec 1s this time round. things were running much smoother than last year, and i’m sure i’ll be able to teach theory better this time round having absorbed some valuable experience teaching that naughty bunch last year. coincidentally, their theory passing rate is rather high; 95% passed, 3 with distinctions and 8 with merit! well done

i’ve evened out the assignment of instruments for now, and i hope things can stay this way. a little more balanced and it’ll be optimum! more euphoniums and tubas please

ok, philwinds concert coming up on sunday, after the mus’art band practice. gotta be busy this coming week! sharks, very tired already. update some other day…

finally. the specialists came today. kinda scary, when i was walking with them, because i know i’m the most junior amongst them, and some of them have been playing music for as long as i’ve breathed, some even longer. i’m surrounded by experts in the band scene: Mr Ng Kok Hin - the King of the Euphonium, Mr Tan Aik Khoon - a very senior band instructor and Trumpet expert, Mrs Angeline Tan - the Queen of Percussion, Mr Pisit Piriyapon - a wizard on the Trombone and of course Mr Richard Png - the King of Jazz Clarinet. very soon, Mr Oura will come too, and Mr Oura is a much respected band instructor in the scene.

i am feeling the pressure already. 86 days to SYF. surrounded by an expert team yielding superb results on the first day they came in, there is no reason why i should not be delivering results too. the last combined rehearsal today showed us what the specialists can do for us: wonders. i felt so different conducting them today! i must also push on and be efficient; not a lot of time left, so i must really deliver positive output from all our sectionals. so blessed to be working with such wonderful instructors!

however, i do not think my ability should be doubted. i have also worked hard to get where i am today. well, shan’t let these bother me!

there’s really not much excuse not to do well now. we just need to get adequate instruments and accessories for the competition, and we’ll have sufficient resources to fight for our Gold with Honours! so members, if you are reading this, we cannot give ourselves any more excuses. all the way, side by side, one mind, one heart, into SYF with the greatest fighting spirit we shall strive!

Gold with Honours!!!!

argh, due to some major screw up, the early bird tickets are only available till tonight! yes, tonight. so if you missed buying the tickets, then you cannot enjoy the $2 off. so please contact me if you want tickets, latest by 11pm tonight so that i can confirm with the ticketing people! so far i have 6 positive responses already, and i’ll book about 10 more myself so that some ‘not-so-early’ birds can still get cheaper tickets. plus some for my family members too. NCWO students, early and late bird subsidy still stands, at $1 per ticket. haha. sorry, i wish i could subsidise more, if only i didn’t have to confirm the tickets so early. i’ll see what i can do for my students who want to come!

you guys must be understanding lah, i haven’t recieved my first pay from the school. hehe.

so please contact me if you wanna come for this concert! i’ll present to you my solo piece for the clarinet and wind band

oh yes. the biggest event in 2007. not counting my graduation and sweetie’s 21st birthday, of course ;D

the fate of all school bands taking part (or otherwise) will be decided within a few days, and a label will be given to the band to carry for the next 2 years. some bands will create history for the right reasons; others will hang their heads in shame. a silver award has many different effects on different bands. even a gold award is a hugely different thing for different bands. every instructor out there will wish that their schools will not be the unlucky ones to recieve a lower award. for me, anything short of a gold award can easily cost me my job.

well, that’s SYF. the biggest event every 2 years for every band member and instructor alike. tempers will flare, students will cry, teachers-in-charge will be stressed out, instructors will lose sleep. but perhaps we have all forgotten that the very essence of SYF lies in the journey towards playing in that nice concert hall with the BIG chinese drum.

the journey. the training. the process. the experience.

this is what’s most valuable in any competition. through this, members bond together, members start hating one another, members start hating instructors, members start to understand the very essence of the music they are playing. anything can happen, and many things will happen. but what i really hope to see is that members, in the process, begin to understand the very reason they joined the band for. they begin to understand what kept them going for the past few short years, coming for every band practice, accepting punishment, slog it out at sectionals, laugh it off over dinner.

music. that’s what keeps us going, isn’t it? and through this music, we find our passion and our love, and we extend this passion and love towards other band members. music brings us all close together, striving for one common goal.

let us remember that no matter what happens, let our music be one of utmost sincerity and innocence. let us touch our own hearts with our music, before we reach out and touch the hearts of our SYF judges. together, with the same spirit, same goal, same heart, let us go for glory

may SYF 2007 be a successful one for all