12 days of band
12 consecutive days… 12 consecutive days of band. be it teaching or playing, or a combination of both, 12 days is a lot. no breaks in between. out of the 12 days, 8 are working days. and so far i’ve only been through 4 days. packed up to my head. woke up at 8, if not earlier, every single day. going to wake up at 8, if not earlier, every single day till next monday.
shaun asked me an interesting question today. he asked how do i cope? actually that’s an extremely good question. the answer is i can’t. really. i can’t cope. my schoolwork’s not exactly in turmoil, but it ain’t very good either. my social life… i don’t seem to have a social life anymore. fortunately i still have some time to spend with her. family life… nonexistent. i speak so little to my family members these days. too tired to talk.
ever since monday i haven’t practised my exam pieces at all. how am i going to pass? i seriously can’t find any time to practise at all. even when i do have the time, i’m deprived of the correct kind of concentration i need. because i’m already dead tired when i have time to touch my instrument (when i’m not teaching or having band practice).
i know, i know, music’s my life. if it’s music we’re talking about, that is. band teaching ain’t exactly all about music. especially if you need to yell at your kids all the time. especially if you have irresponsible members in the band who do not take in what you teach and apply them in their playing. most of all they do not get their jobs done.
those who want the resources are deprived of them… ironically… by those who have the resources but abuse them.
unfortunately, the above statement applies to many different aspects of life as well. which is also the reason why i’m working so hard for money. for survival. because people who earn the money spend them on unecessary stuff, when they can help out the household. why should i be branded a spendthrift and also as someone who treats the house like a hotel? why? because i’m working so hard so that i don’t have to be supported?
at least don’t say stupid things to me. that’s the least you could do. and perhaps leave me alone when i’m doing work.
